I made a biggest lifetime decision - to start a family with Rak.
Being together for less than a month and we actually discuss about marriage (eh, not so much) to babies, is that normal or too fast?
Im feeling a little skeptical about the whole issue. I mean people who knows me well, knows I love kids. How adorable are they! But of course, having your own versus playing with the little ones who are not biologically yours, makes a huge difference- educations, upbringing, etc. We have yet spoken about how to raise a child, neither of us is an expert in this department. Ive got simply no idea what is his views on raising one.
As for myself, i know what kind of mom I want to be, the kind of tolerance level towards my child's behavior... Expectations, of course.
I do spiritually feel that Rak can be a fantastic dad and perhaps he will do much better than me in the parental role. I bet if we are gonna have kids, Im gonna played the "bad, ugly... Unreasonable mom"... Having said this, I do strongly agreed that Rak is super knowledgeable, much patience, higher tolerance nonsensical level... He cooks, he games... Whats more can I asked for?
I want a good daddy for my kid/s... Am i selfish? Haha!
To me, I just feel that he is the one who fits exactly what I want for my kid/s... Enough enough... Haha! Im starting to sound as if im marketing him (oops! Sorry. He is definitely not for sales.)...
Back to the topic. I am pretty excited about it, googled as much info as I can. Im really looking forward to share the special gift that belongs to us, how cool. Least to say, im fine with whichever plans we have as per discussions. But perhaps, for the time being, let us enjoy the process and the dating experience.
Hmmm, baby...
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Yummy (2)
My Rak's home-cooked dinner. I'm so blessed. :)
(/2hours worth of wait...)
Nothings so comforting as this.
Loves, Cheryl
Monday, June 18, 2012
Sawadee
It seems like everyone seems to remember about "Mothers' Day" rather than "Fathers' Day".
This year, I thought that it will be a little tad special because there's another person who is joining us. Thus I postpone the dinner-date to a day later. Well, I could say it was a brilliant idea (/at the end of the day) because everything seems to go on rather smoothly in a way.
I know dad and Rak seems to like Thai Cuisine much thus I decided to have that as the menu for the evening.
Anyway, it was fun to shop for groceries at Golden Mile Complex.
(/Ehmmm, I couldn't find the USB that connects to my computer - DSLR. So bear with it...)
And of course, we act silly, goofy, we play, we laugh, we chat... and these are really moments that is GOLD...
And let me tell you, never put 2 guys who loves eating together, because then, the conversation will go non-stop. Hahaha, Anyway thanks Rak! I love to see you and dad bond but... umm! :) Lets see how things flow and goes and... Ummm!
This year, I thought that it will be a little tad special because there's another person who is joining us. Thus I postpone the dinner-date to a day later. Well, I could say it was a brilliant idea (/at the end of the day) because everything seems to go on rather smoothly in a way.
I know dad and Rak seems to like Thai Cuisine much thus I decided to have that as the menu for the evening.
It was meant to be a surprise for the both guys, however, I couldn't hold this surprise well, and I let the cat out of the bag way before dinner.
Anyway, it was fun to shop for groceries at Golden Mile Complex.
I love to see everyone ends the meal with a smile on their face. There's something which I don't really like about whipping up Thai Cuisine - The heat of the spices that somehow gives you a burning sensation on your skin if it's not handled well. I'm glad that the 2 guys enjoyed themselves with loads of KICK in it.
Mom was jealous in a way. She was asking why am I not cooking her favourite food, that's because IT'S REALLY NOT HER DAY! Okay, I'll promise a good dinner for her soon... Her birthday, perhaps? Hmmm, let me discuss this together with Rak.
Rak came over with dad's favourite - Tiramisu Cake (from Delifrance). Thanks Rak, anyway. It's really sweet and thoughtful of you to bring that.
Mom was jealous in a way. She was asking why am I not cooking her favourite food, that's because IT'S REALLY NOT HER DAY! Okay, I'll promise a good dinner for her soon... Her birthday, perhaps? Hmmm, let me discuss this together with Rak.
Rak came over with dad's favourite - Tiramisu Cake (from Delifrance). Thanks Rak, anyway. It's really sweet and thoughtful of you to bring that.
Both of us decided to take a stroll after the hearty dinner at the nearby park without any disturbance (Read: No mobile - Yay! And I did it...)... We really enjoyed the breeze, the companion and of course... everything underneath the black-velvety carpet...
(/Ehmmm, I couldn't find the USB that connects to my computer - DSLR. So bear with it...)
And of course, we act silly, goofy, we play, we laugh, we chat... and these are really moments that is GOLD...
Of course, not forgetting that we end the night with a slice of loves and a cup of happiness.
And let me tell you, never put 2 guys who loves eating together, because then, the conversation will go non-stop. Hahaha, Anyway thanks Rak! I love to see you and dad bond but... umm! :) Lets see how things flow and goes and... Ummm!
XOXOXO
Cheryl
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Dinner with the guys
I managed to survive thru with little rest, but I'm still quiet tired though...
To make Rak feels better and to show him a little appreciations, I decided to go out with him and 2 of the guy friends. Rak needs his friends too, to be fair. He can't always be with me and my gfs... He needs his bonding with our male friends too. I would love to be with Rak 24/7 but I can't expect him to always be there when I'm meeting with my friends, talking girly stuffs and bore him away...
Nothing else matters to see how Rak enjoys being with the guy friends. I'm truly blessed. :)
As usual, I went over for my usual meditation class (Poor Rak, who is done with his exams and have to wait for me... and without any least grumble.).. and meet up with Rak.
I wanted to cook something, either Bak Ku Teh or Japanese Curry Rice for him. However, I was too tired and I really couldn't find any of the ingredients I need. :( In fact, in the morning, I am supposed to continue with the volunteery work with Sally. I was too tired, really. Anyhow, I decided to wake at 7am (Note : I slept at 3ish am which was crazy I tell you) and wait for her to reach my area... And we had KFC for brekkie. Sinful but yummy. (I seldom get to feast for brekkie these days, I need to watch my waistline for goodness sake!)
I wanted to cook something, either Bak Ku Teh or Japanese Curry Rice for him. However, I was too tired and I really couldn't find any of the ingredients I need. :( In fact, in the morning, I am supposed to continue with the volunteery work with Sally. I was too tired, really. Anyhow, I decided to wake at 7am (Note : I slept at 3ish am which was crazy I tell you) and wait for her to reach my area... And we had KFC for brekkie. Sinful but yummy. (I seldom get to feast for brekkie these days, I need to watch my waistline for goodness sake!)
Anyhow, lets just fast forward a little bit...
To make Rak feels better and to show him a little appreciations, I decided to go out with him and 2 of the guy friends. Rak needs his friends too, to be fair. He can't always be with me and my gfs... He needs his bonding with our male friends too. I would love to be with Rak 24/7 but I can't expect him to always be there when I'm meeting with my friends, talking girly stuffs and bore him away...
So we made it to.... Toniku @ Lido, Shaw House, nice food (except that the service isn't really that good - towards the ending as the crowds flow in.)
Nothing else matters to see how Rak enjoys being with the guy friends. I'm truly blessed. :)
V-Day
I mean Volunteering Day!
Project Give - It was for the kids (with Special Needs) and their family.
And...
This is the project for the Elders - Old folk Home...
This is the most tiring yet fruitfulling Saturday of my life. My gf and I volunteered in 2 charity organizations : One for the kids and another for the Elders.
Project Give - It was for the kids (with Special Needs) and their family.
And...
This is the project for the Elders - Old folk Home...
My energy was zapped yet I (/call me silly then) managed to drag my feet to meet up with the group of friends and Rak. :)
The only thing I really appreciate is, the few minutes in Dad's car - with Rak and him talk. Oh well... Tell me, it's all worth it... Good Night, all. :)
(Note : Cant you feel that I'm very tired that I'm writing less than ever?)
The only thing I really appreciate is, the few minutes in Dad's car - with Rak and him talk. Oh well... Tell me, it's all worth it... Good Night, all. :)
(Note : Cant you feel that I'm very tired that I'm writing less than ever?)
XOXO
Cheryl
Thursday, June 14, 2012
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Aglio Olio - (Him)
It was my first trip to his place and Rak took the initiative to clean up his room the day before. The warm crisp room greeted me with a smile...
And guess what, he cooked my favorite pasta (just the way I love it)... Aglio Olio.
Yummilicious to the max and belly satisfied. My very first home-cooked Aglio Olio by a man...
I'm touched and I am very sure that noone can replace that plate of Aglio Olio cooked by him. My comfort food.
Loves you to the max, Rak :)
(Sadly, there is not pictures because I was too excited about gobbling that whole plate of carbs with love...)
And guess what, he cooked my favorite pasta (just the way I love it)... Aglio Olio.
Yummilicious to the max and belly satisfied. My very first home-cooked Aglio Olio by a man...
I'm touched and I am very sure that noone can replace that plate of Aglio Olio cooked by him. My comfort food.
Loves you to the max, Rak :)
(Sadly, there is not pictures because I was too excited about gobbling that whole plate of carbs with love...)
Monday, June 4, 2012
Sticky-Yucky (end)
Everyone seems to have taken sides when things happen (be it good or bad). For I know I've already done my best to make things better, it's hard I know but I have no control over what and how people start to think about me or the reasons behind my "hyprocries"...
I found my real friends - those who gave us their blessings, friends who only can remain by the word: Friend.
Yesterday, Venerable SL said : Good friends are friends who liften you spiritually and always be there for you...
I failed badly this time because I think I'm thinking way too much for people who doesn't deserve my attentions for no matter how hard I tried and hoping to make him feel better. I know this shouldn't be the issue for me or anyone else to be involved and neither I should be ranting it here... However, I really find it disturbing for me. I'm not trying to please anyone of who WE may know of, neither I want to talk about it anymore because I really have move on and this shouldn't be bothering me, really.
I do not quite agree that the reason for being affected is because I'm lingering any feelings for him (READS: BGR) and outta so many others. Perhaps it irks me whenever he start posting some EMO stuffs on his FB - Okay, i've hold no control over what he posted, just that whenever I enter FB, his status will somehow flash up right in front of my sight, and I feel bad about it. C'mon, why must he be doing all these to me! Why do this to make me feel as if I've dumped him or something... Nothing has happen between us and I'm sure we should already have mutual understandings that we can not be together. I know he has done his best but I just don't feel good whenever I thought about the few times that he 'scare' me. Fine, I'm not b*tching bad stuffs about him. Everyone is unique in their own ways.
There is no reason why he should be doing all the small, childish acts in front of me. It just makes me feel that whatever the decision I've made was right and thats all. It's not wrong to be upset that we can't be together. It's not wrong to like someone. I do believe that we can still be friends though it may take some time for him to 'recuperate', but for now, it just disgust me for every emo post he posted. I feel silly to keep repeating myself to Ruk to talk to him and make things better.
I dislike myself to be in this kinda sticky situation. He is OUR friend, Rak's coffee-partner... I hope not that their friendship will be jeopordized because of a relationship - Okay I know Rak will start his 101 reasonings to me... Sigh, maybe I shouldn't get involved. I shouldn't be asking Rak to talk to him - hey there's nothing to talk about, seriously.
Now I guess, Friends (whoever you know you are), if you want to take on his side, it's fine with me. If you think I did not end up with this gentleman, it's my loss or i'm sucha piece of whatever-name-you-wanna-name-me, it's okay and hope that makes y'all feel better.
This shall ends my guilt towards him and whichever direction the friendship heads, just let nature takes its own course... Whichever direction Rak-and-his friendship heads, it's between the guys.
If you want the reasons why it's not him, ask yourself, "Does it matters anymore?"If you want to know WHY (certainly many may want to know) did I choose Rak... Read on.
But for sure, Rak didn't appear when this gentleman is trying to win my heart. Even if it's not Rak, it will NEVER be this gentleman, that's for sure. (May the BEST man wins)
And if you happen to be the gentleman reading this post (you know who you are), I sincerely hope that you can pick up yourself and face the reality.
Now we know who are my real friends and of course, this case shall ends here and noone is to re-visit this case again.
*smile*
I found my real friends - those who gave us their blessings, friends who only can remain by the word: Friend.
Yesterday, Venerable SL said : Good friends are friends who liften you spiritually and always be there for you...
I failed badly this time because I think I'm thinking way too much for people who doesn't deserve my attentions for no matter how hard I tried and hoping to make him feel better. I know this shouldn't be the issue for me or anyone else to be involved and neither I should be ranting it here... However, I really find it disturbing for me. I'm not trying to please anyone of who WE may know of, neither I want to talk about it anymore because I really have move on and this shouldn't be bothering me, really.
I do not quite agree that the reason for being affected is because I'm lingering any feelings for him (READS: BGR) and outta so many others. Perhaps it irks me whenever he start posting some EMO stuffs on his FB - Okay, i've hold no control over what he posted, just that whenever I enter FB, his status will somehow flash up right in front of my sight, and I feel bad about it. C'mon, why must he be doing all these to me! Why do this to make me feel as if I've dumped him or something... Nothing has happen between us and I'm sure we should already have mutual understandings that we can not be together. I know he has done his best but I just don't feel good whenever I thought about the few times that he 'scare' me. Fine, I'm not b*tching bad stuffs about him. Everyone is unique in their own ways.
There is no reason why he should be doing all the small, childish acts in front of me. It just makes me feel that whatever the decision I've made was right and thats all. It's not wrong to be upset that we can't be together. It's not wrong to like someone. I do believe that we can still be friends though it may take some time for him to 'recuperate', but for now, it just disgust me for every emo post he posted. I feel silly to keep repeating myself to Ruk to talk to him and make things better.
I dislike myself to be in this kinda sticky situation. He is OUR friend, Rak's coffee-partner... I hope not that their friendship will be jeopordized because of a relationship - Okay I know Rak will start his 101 reasonings to me... Sigh, maybe I shouldn't get involved. I shouldn't be asking Rak to talk to him - hey there's nothing to talk about, seriously.
Now I guess, Friends (whoever you know you are), if you want to take on his side, it's fine with me. If you think I did not end up with this gentleman, it's my loss or i'm sucha piece of whatever-name-you-wanna-name-me, it's okay and hope that makes y'all feel better.
This shall ends my guilt towards him and whichever direction the friendship heads, just let nature takes its own course... Whichever direction Rak-and-his friendship heads, it's between the guys.
If you want the reasons why it's not him, ask yourself, "Does it matters anymore?"If you want to know WHY (certainly many may want to know) did I choose Rak... Read on.
But for sure, Rak didn't appear when this gentleman is trying to win my heart. Even if it's not Rak, it will NEVER be this gentleman, that's for sure. (May the BEST man wins)
And if you happen to be the gentleman reading this post (you know who you are), I sincerely hope that you can pick up yourself and face the reality.
Now we know who are my real friends and of course, this case shall ends here and noone is to re-visit this case again.
*smile*
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Rak Ræe Hen
Rak ræe hen means Love at First Sight (In Thai).
Hee! I decided to start blogging (/having countless of unsuccessful blogs) because I always believe that in every relationship could take me to a new height in life. Since not all pasts are pleasing to ears, but I am very sure that each and every relationships has lessons to be learnt from and great experiences that will not be easily forgotten, least to say, it held certain degree of memories stores till perhaps a new one come along- to make or to break.
Sometimes, things happened for certain reasons and its just beyond explanations.
When you least expect it, it will just come knocking on your doorstep... If it doesnt happen, always have Faith in it but dont expect it to be answered so soon. I still remember the evening before everything took place, I sent a text message to one of my girlfriends, telling her how taxing I feel (no, not because I have been trying to search for love or given up hopes, its more than this and what crazy stuffs are sitting right there for me to solve...). I was completely tired from the Love Game, come on! You must be thinking Im being silly again. Nah, not again. I just think Ive spoken things relatively fast (yes, this means Ive not been really meditating well or so...) but i have been mixing too much of personal emotions into others. Yes, why bother anyway, people think im being fake? But on the other hand, I am just playing my part as a frien (we still can be friends even not a lover...), I live to my conscious clear. Life is very profound yet simple in a way, same goes for any relationship.
Hmmm! Just before I was about to walk my journey of singlehood, the Universe decides to send someone to accompany me. It was quite interesting for things do happen too fast too furious... Till now Im still trying to convince myself that everything is Real and Im not dreaming. To be honest, everything was really "at first sight"...
How does that feels? You will feel it when you learn how to let go of the past and live life as normal. It was not easy but all I could say its worth it because he appears when I need someone most (ok, its tough to explain this part but I just know, this is the very best point where Universe convinced me that he is there when I really need him most.)... Sensing the spiritual vibe he gives when we first meet (thanks to Angelize babe) and everything seems pre-planned but hey no, it wasnt.
Its just rational, and for all these days, I know Im entering a candy-floss machine. Hmmm! Should I not say things too soon?
Hmm! Maybe this is sparks, this is miracle. I will cherish every moment for I believe...
XOXOXO, Cheryl
Hee! I decided to start blogging (/having countless of unsuccessful blogs) because I always believe that in every relationship could take me to a new height in life. Since not all pasts are pleasing to ears, but I am very sure that each and every relationships has lessons to be learnt from and great experiences that will not be easily forgotten, least to say, it held certain degree of memories stores till perhaps a new one come along- to make or to break.
Sometimes, things happened for certain reasons and its just beyond explanations.
When you least expect it, it will just come knocking on your doorstep... If it doesnt happen, always have Faith in it but dont expect it to be answered so soon. I still remember the evening before everything took place, I sent a text message to one of my girlfriends, telling her how taxing I feel (no, not because I have been trying to search for love or given up hopes, its more than this and what crazy stuffs are sitting right there for me to solve...). I was completely tired from the Love Game, come on! You must be thinking Im being silly again. Nah, not again. I just think Ive spoken things relatively fast (yes, this means Ive not been really meditating well or so...) but i have been mixing too much of personal emotions into others. Yes, why bother anyway, people think im being fake? But on the other hand, I am just playing my part as a frien (we still can be friends even not a lover...), I live to my conscious clear. Life is very profound yet simple in a way, same goes for any relationship.
Hmmm! Just before I was about to walk my journey of singlehood, the Universe decides to send someone to accompany me. It was quite interesting for things do happen too fast too furious... Till now Im still trying to convince myself that everything is Real and Im not dreaming. To be honest, everything was really "at first sight"...
How does that feels? You will feel it when you learn how to let go of the past and live life as normal. It was not easy but all I could say its worth it because he appears when I need someone most (ok, its tough to explain this part but I just know, this is the very best point where Universe convinced me that he is there when I really need him most.)... Sensing the spiritual vibe he gives when we first meet (thanks to Angelize babe) and everything seems pre-planned but hey no, it wasnt.
Its just rational, and for all these days, I know Im entering a candy-floss machine. Hmmm! Should I not say things too soon?
Hmm! Maybe this is sparks, this is miracle. I will cherish every moment for I believe...
XOXOXO, Cheryl
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